In many areas, I crave consistency. I like when the subway comes on time and how my hair will be reliably perfect on the third day since my last wash.
Sometimes the lighting is dim or the camera lens on my phone is dirty. Other times, I can't convince my face and body to do something sexy at the same time. Sexy result is always a weirdly cropped, uncomfortable-looking photo that I'd rather delete than send to anyone mostsexestwomen. And that sort of defeats the purpose of a nude selfie—at least, the ones I'm taking.
Self of continuing to suffer from my chronic inability to take a hot nude, I turned to the experts: Then I did an IRL boudoir shoot with one of nudist.
Their first lesson: Mood matters, as much as any pose or facial expression. This shocked me. No longer.
Their second lesson: