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Pleasing sister

Digital Culture & Society

People Pleasing is another theme that seems to be plaguing many of my clients lately. I admit it is something I with which I have and continue to struggle. In fact, we learned that our role is to predict, mind read and generally guess what the other person needs or might need so that we can fill it for them. Here is an extreme example of a friend of mine.

What are you Gaining from People Pleasing? | Live Happier

Liz not her real name attended her annual family vacation last pleasing. She spent the whole week of vacation, trying to figure out the perfect restaurant for everyone, the perfect beach spot, the perfect dinnertime conversation! Sister asked Liz what would happen if she stopped engaging in the behavior and she said she had no idea but she could only imagine how awful it would be.

She had played this role for years and they counted on her they pleasing her in that role.

Digital Culture & Society

The first step in trying to change your people-pleasing ways is to recognize that you engage in this behavior. The second step is to recognize that you are getting something out of it!!! Yep, that is a hard mature nudes bus to swallow, my friend.

But it is true. As a people pleaser, we tend to get in sister rut of believing we are irreplaceable believing that our overt need to over give, and wear ourselves out is helping everyone.

In reality, we are hurting ourselves AND those around us.